BrendaHubbard

How can the overwhelming rush and thoughts of meeting family life demands be done without a guide to help me through tough times?

No wonder individuals with no guidance fall into a substance to keep them afloat, like alcohol, drugs, anti-depressants, and pills to help them sleep, and when it is just so much to handle, they throw in the towel and file for divorce. How can a woman cope with the many demands a household needs from work, a husband, the kids, family, friends, and home life without a vital source? I discovered that she couldn’t cope without some substances, and before I go any further, meaning is not just something you consume. It can be something you do to ease or distract your mind. 

And God spoke all these words: You shall have no other gods before me. You shall not make for yourself an image in the form of anything in heaven above or on the earth beneath or in the waters below. You shall not bow down to them or worship them; for I, the Lord your God, am a jealous God, punishing the children for the sin of the parents to the third and fourth generation of those who hate me, but showing love to a thousand generations of those who love me and keep my commandments. Exodus 20:1-6 

(Exodus 20:1-6 explained) Today we can allow many things to become gods to us. Money, fame, work, or pleasure can become gods when we concentrate too much on them for personal identity, meaning, and security. No one sets out with the intention of worshiping these things. But by the amount of time we devote to them, they can grow into gods that ultimately control our thoughts and energies. Letting God hold the central place in our lives keeps these things from turning into gods. 

As a mom and a bonus mom, I am more willing to bend over backward for the children I birthed than those I did not birth. It is an instinct that every woman has. This connection between a mother and a child was made before the child was born. It is an unexplainable feeling that only another mother could understand. But what division and unnecessary strife is being birthed before my eyes between siblings and step-siblings? I may not mean to hurt anyone, but actions can pierce deeper since now the child has a whole movie clip to replay in their mind, which the enemy can use as a weapon of destruction for the entire family. Seeking God daily to surrender my selfish ways and sinful nature is vital for a peaceful and loving household. The power that a mom possesses in the home is like a thermostat. It can turn it up or down based on where she is spiritually. 

But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Galatians 5:22, 23

(Galatians 5:22,23 explained) 

The fruit of the Spirit is the spontaneous work of the Holy Spirit in us. The Spirit produces these character traits that are found in the nature of Christ. They are the by-products of Christ’s control-we can’t obtain them by trying to get them without his help. If we want the fruit of the Spirit to grow in us, we must join our lives to his. We must know him, love him, remember him, imitate him. As a result, we will fulfill the intended purpose of the law-to love God and our neighbors. Which of these qualities do you want the Spirit to produce in you? 

The harvest from these fruits is like a clear stream of fresh water that never ends or runs dry as long as the farmer spreads seeds on fertile ground. Meaning seeking God first daily. 

Children are a blessing from God, and it is not their fault they ended up in a blended household. Now the parents are the overseers of these young people and will have to answer to God for their lack of doing right by them. As moms, we carry more responsibility since God wired us to be loving, caring, and nurturing. Here are a few tips that have helped me navigate my blended household:

1. Pray and read the actual bible Daily- the keyword is Daily. Carve out some time during the day that works best to spend some quiet time reading and praying—humbling yourself before a faithful God. The best time for me is early morning. 
2. Communication- Find time to check in with your spouse and each child as best you can. Have family meetings at least once a month to have group discussions.
3. Remember- the blessing that it is that God chose you to be a mom not just to the children you birthed but to have a drastic impact on children you did not birth that will be better human beings because someone that cared said yes to being there for them. 

For I know the plans I have for you, says the Lord. They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope. 

Jeremiah 29:11. What a blessing to know that God has a detailed written plan for our lives all we have to do is seek him for guidance and strength to follow the path laid out for us. 

Heavenly Father, thank you for the person on the other side of this screen reading the words before their precious eyes. Allow this reading to help them look at you and only you, Lord. Thank you for using me, your unworthy servant willing to stay obedient to a faithful, loving, never, failing Father like yourself. We love you, Lord, and we praise your holy name in Jesus’s name. Amen.