BrendaHubbard

As I slowly move my eyes and struggle a bit to open up my eyelids to roll over in my bed and notice it’s still dark outside, thank Goodness! that means I still have time before getting my day started. Then I muster up the strength to move my arm over to my right, tap my phone on my nightstand, to notice the unpleasant news that it is 3 am. I roll my sleepy eyes, inhale and exhale, almost wanting to throw 1 of my many pillows across the room but without energy and quickly deciding there is not enough strength for that, plus I would probably wake my husband up. Still, maybe he will not even notice, considering he looks so at peace. Ugh! How can he be so at ease, and I am over here with aching, swollen feet and waking up every 2 hours to pee. Lord Jesus, please continue to help me. The last time I woke up was a little bit after midnight, and per usual went to bed past 9:30 pm. If I am not hungry, I have to pee, and if that is not the case, It is usually something else.

My most desired blessing and miracle has come with a price. But Is that not just how God operates? He will give you the gift but not without you giving something up for it. Why? Have you ever thought about why does it have to be this way? Well, based on what I have learned and read, our God is a Jealous God.
Exodus 20:3-5 states the following: 3.You must not have any other God but me. 4.You must not make for yourself an idol of any kind or an image of anything in the heavens or on the earth or in the sea. 5.You must not bow down to them or worship them, for I, the Lord your God, am a jealous God who will not tolerate your affection for any other Gods.
You might think the same thing I did well, Lord; you are my only God. I got that down, but we can allow many things to become our God in today’s day and age without notice. Work, Exercising, Pleasure, Social life and the list goes on. When you are Dedicating too much time to something for personal security or other motives, that can become your God. No one sets out to do this, but slowly, it controls your time and energy. Allowing God to hold the central place in our lives keeps these things from turning into our Gods. And obtaining a desired prayer can also become an idol and take the place of God.

Hello Friends and Family, I am 27 weeks pregnant, literally on the last week of my second trimester, and I want to invite you to read a glimpse of how my most desired prayer is going. With the hope that, in some ways, you can relate to me. Have you had something that you prayed and wanted so much that at times you have to catch yourself from huffing and puffing about the unforeseen changes it has brought on your lives that you did not take into account before petitioning to God about it? If you have, great! I am glad to know that I am not alone. But if you have not, give it some time (as I smile with a smirk on my face).

The above prayer says the following: (I know there are some grammar errors, but I am showing you exactly what I wrote down)
10-21-20 For our baby…(Answered Prayer Prego 1-31-21)
Heavenly Father, Thank you for blessing me/myself and Matthew with the privilege of having a baby of our own together. Lord, thank you for blessing us with her. Thank you for the powerful annointing that she’s carrying being molded and created from my womb. Thank you for what your doing with her. Thank you for blessing us with an amazing and healthy pregnancy. Thank you for her healthy weight. And her beautiful glowing skin. Thank you for the love and unity she will be bringing to our family. Thank you for encamping your angels around her and protecting her. Thank you for using me to bring another powerful warrior to break chains and build something incredible for generations to come, In Jesus Name. No weapon that is formed against her will prosper in Jesus Name Amen.

Fast forward to today…I can only sleep for about 2 hours at a time, the most 3 hours before I have to wake up to use the bathroom. I need a pillow in between my legs to get comfortable and accommodate my growing belly. My hands and feet are always swollen, and when I say always, I mean I wake up swollen and go to bed with them this way. Which doctor has already checked me and says I am fine and that it is normal and to continue drinking more water. I have looked at her and said, are you serious!? Ma’am, I almost live in a bathroom, and at this point, I should look into some depends (As I laugh out loud). If I am in a position too long, my back is aching. I have gained over 25 pounds at this point. I am hungry all the time, tired, and the list goes on and on. So in the midst of all of this happening, I am in constant battle with my mind telling myself this is a privilege, a blessing; you are of the few chosen ones that get to experience this. Not once, but now twice. Remember when you cried to God for this? Here is the price that comes with this privilege.
Luke 1:30 “Don’t be afraid, Mary,” the angel told her, “for you have found favor with God! God’s favor and blessings do not always bring instant success. It may feel that way, but Mary’s privilege would then lead to much pain: her peers would ridicule her, her fiance would want to leave her, and her son, who was sent as the Messiah, the Savior of our world, would be rejected and murdered. Yet Mary was still blessed and had found favor with God to handle such an assignment.

Even though an answered prayer or an assignment might seem too much after it has been obtained, remember God will not give us something that He did not already know we could have victory over and endure. Plus, if He gave us the blessing without any challenges, how could we continually seek him and call upon his name for help through the difficult times that arise. A Humble state of mind is needed even after obtaining what you desired most because it reminds us to appreciate what we have and never take it for granted. As hard as it is to navigate the changes in my body to give life to our baby, I am reminded that this is a privilege that many women wish they could have. I am reminded that I cannot do this independently and that it was not meant for me to carry this burden alone. I am to pray daily for strength, call on my God for guidance, get in community with others, and get advice and know that I am not the only one going through these changes. Beloved Friend and Family, the same goes for you. We all have different assignments and lessons to learn as we go through them but do not think for once you have to do it alone because that is a lie from the pit of hell, and our God does not want us to go through or believe we have to do anything alone.
Hebrews 13:5-6 states For He himself has said, “I will never leave you nor forsake you.” So we may boldly say: “The Lord is my helper; I will not fear.

Heavenly Father, Thank you for the reader on the other side of this screen; thank you for their life and what they continue to endure. Please give them the strength, courage, and wisdom to keep pushing forward. Remind them that you will never leave them nor forsake them and that you are always there even when it seems they are so alone. Father, guide us all down the path you have laid before us and give us obedience in every area of our life. May your glory shine brightly in all areas, and may your will be done. In Jesus Name, Amen.